This week literally flew by. I’ve been enjoying the flexibility of not having to squeeze in nap time for my daughter. I resisted this for so long and it’s been so great I wish I would have done it sooner. Most mornings I’ve had some quiet time to start the day and an actual evening too. Ian is stronger everyday and so super cute. He gets this surprised look on his face that makes me laugh. I imagine every time he wakes up he thinks he’s still snuggled up on the inside and then he opens his eyes and realizes he’s earth side. What a wild transition it must be! (Especially since he almost always wakes up in a completely different place from where he fell asleep) 

My young niece asked me recently if she looked fat. She’s a healthy, strong kid. It breaks my heart it’s already something on her radar. How did we get here anyway? How have unrealistic, photoshopped images become a worthy goal when it’s nothing anyone has ever seen in person. To all women: you are enough just as you are. Let’s stop buying into all this bs. 

I am learning to knit a hat from a lovely, empowered woman in her 90s. She still drives, lives independently, and works. I love hearing her stories. (I hope I’m half as cool if I get the chance to be that old) I’m hoping to finish the hat tomorrow. 

I don’t have much else to say other than I feel really happy, thankful and strong. The scale dropped another 3 pounds this week which is always pleasant to see. 

Seriously though, I’m reminding you again. You. Are. Enough. Just. As. You. Are 

This week I have to give a huge shout out to Breastfeeding USA. We went to the West Dundee chapter meeting and it was the biggest turn out they have ever had. It was really neat to see so many moms breastfeeding and supporting each other. It was also super cool to see so many variations of the post partum body.

When Lia was born there was a gang of us with new-borns on maternity leave. It felt like being in a protective bubble. I was surprised at how self-conscious I felt about nursing around people when Ian was born especially since I nursed Lia for so long in all sorts of settings and how isolated I felt (still sometimes feel) Nursing a new-born is uncharted territory, being a new mom no matter how many kids you have is still being a new mom. Going to the meeting made me feel not so isolated and it reaffirmed many things for me, not just breastfeeding related.

I cleaned out all of my maternity clothes from my closet this week as well as all the clothes that won’t fit for some time so that when I go to get dressed only things that will fit are options. Its been very liberating. I’ve felt really comfortable in my body all week. I also feel really strong, which is a great feeling. Friday I took the kiddos to the splash pad which is a good distance round trip, pushing an almost 40 pound pre-schooler and babywearing a probably close to 15 pound infant made me feel like I was training for a mountain climb. 🙂 The scale moved down 1 pound this week which felt very motivating as well.

Lia and I went on our first “date” since the baby has been born. It felt really good to reconnect and be fully present for an hour. Sometimes I see the look in her eyes when I’m failing miserably at not losing my cool when I’m asking her to do something and she’s not robotically complying saying who are you and what have you done with my mother?! I hate those moments for all of us. Being alone together really helped with feeling touched out and feeling recharged for another week of motherhood.

Here are week 8 pictures. And a look at where I started. The human body is so very amazing.

Week 8

2 Days post partum

4 weeks post partum

8 weeks post partum

Week 7.

There has been alot of surrendering this week, especially of expectations.

We braved Woodfield mall today during back to school shopping no less. I bought some pants even though I’m hoping they won’t fit for long. The scale hasn’t shifted since giving birth but obviously there is change happening.

As far as this second sweet child of mine goes it seems worth noting that this week he’s really started to come alive and seems so present.

On the SAHM self care front, this week I went to a girls night in a beautiful friend’s garden and we had a coloring party.

6 weeks, 6 weeks already. Can someone tell my son to stop growing so fast?

I snuck away for a haircut this Saturday and the stylist asked what was the hardest part about having 2 kids. It was tough to answer because nothing really seems “hard.” I took a walk today and pondered it. (we took a walk to the green park which is about 2 miles round trip and another good long walk by the walking path)

What’s hard about being a mother of 2 is that just like being a mother of 1 and I imagine a mother of 3 is that you are a completely different person. Its not to say that being a mother of 1 is easier or a mother of more than 1 is harder its that you are different.  I wonder if that’s what the stretch marks are really all about, a gentle reminder every morning that you are now so much more than you were before this soul was placed in your care and you are forever changed physically, emotionally, spiritually etc. First the body has to stretch to contain this new life and then so does everything else and there are growing pains in that. There are moments when its hard to remember that old life that really isn’t so old, when my 3 year old felt small on my lap and now feels so so big especially when both of them tangle up in my arms. What’s been hardest is not having the time to adjust to being a mother to two, to having a husband that is a father to two, or a daughter that is now also a sister.  What makes this the hardest is the expectation to have it all figured out right away. Having a second child isn’t like having the first again. Its easy to want to compare and yet there is really no way to.

I hope some of that made a shred of sense, is there a big hormonal shift at 6 weeks post partum or maybe it was the blue super moon? Here’s to week seven feeling a little lighter. Oh, and Happy Breastfeeding week!